Counter-Programming the Narrative (Taking a Punch)
by Hilary Gridley • Head of Core Product at Whoop
Hilary Gridley is the Head of Core Product at Whoop, focusing on health and fitness technology. Previously, she served as Senior Director of Product at Big Health and Senior Product Marketing Manager at Dropbox, bringing deep expertise in behavioral psychology, mental health tech, and product leadership.
🎙️ Episode Context
Hilary Gridley joins Lenny to discuss the intersection of product leadership, behavioral psychology, and AI. She shares unique frameworks for resilience ('taking a punch'), aligning with difficult leadership decisions through mental modeling, and designing habit-forming products using emotional reward loops.
Problem It Solves
Helps PMs stop spiraling or becoming defensive when they make a mistake, receive criticism, or feel their reputation is damaged.
Framework Overview
Instead of trying to 'litigate' the past or explain away a mistake, identify the negative narrative you fear others hold about you. Then, take one small, concrete action that demonstrates the exact opposite of that narrative to shift perception and regain agency.
🧠 Framework Structure
Don't litigate the past: Explaining w...
Identify the Fear: Ask 'What specific...
Counter-Program: Execute one small, h...
When to Use
When you've had an awkward interaction, a failed presentation, or received critical feedback that makes you feel insecure.
Common Mistakes
Apologizing profusely or writing long emails explaining your intentions instead of demonstrating capability through new action.
Real World Example
Hilary laughed at a 'ketamine tracking' idea from the CTO, appearing insensitive. Instead of apologizing, she researched emerging health trends (sports betting) and sent a thoughtful note connecting the two, proving she takes serious health issues seriously.
If they come to me and they're upset, I try to focus them less around how you litigate another person's impression of you and more on what is the action that you can take to counter program the narrative.
— Hilary Gridley